I am at a point right now, this very second, where there is nothing I want more is to be smaller. I currently weigh 231 pounds and I hate myself. I hate the way I look, I hate they way I feel, and I hate the way I can never find clothes. I look terrible. I can't even go shopping without having a break down when I get home, or even in the store. I'm stressed out and I'm tired of hating my life. I was suppose to work out this summer. I did for two weeks then stopped. I could partially blame it on someone who was working out with us, but all in all: It was all my fault. So now, I'm on Livestrong.com with a goal of two pounds a week. This means I am allowed to eat 1269 calories per day. So far, I'm doing alright. I took a trip to West Virginia Wednesday through Friday, where I could not update. I did alright but I know having sweets killed me. So why am I writing all this? Because I have a goal. I want to weigh 180 pounds and be a size 12, or what ever size 180 pounds would let me fit into. Once track begins in November, I will be loosing more weigh and still sticking to the diet of 1269 calories a day. But I do not want to wait till November to start. So my goal is by February, which is in 7 months.
I am going to make this happen. I am going to have a hella successful track year, because I'm going to make it happen. I actually just found a inspirational tumblr for being fit, and I'm hella motivated.
I am ready.
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